Act!

It is rare that I’m given a chance at acting. Not that I think I’m good at it, or really wish to be in it, but it seems to add variety into my life... at least at that point of time.

Early during the week, Rebecca’s JC friend Chai Ling, SMSed her to ask if she & her BF would be kind enough to stand in as actor & actress in an acted-out pre-marital counseling workshop, as part of their social work undergraduate project. After some thought, we agreed. So we set off after church on Sunday, embarked for Redhill MRT station where she would be meeting us.

It was raining ‘cats & dogs’. All 3 of us missed the bus stop & had to turn around, walk all the way to the other side of the road (it’s a one-way street) & began waving to hail a cab near a bus stop. Thankfully, God was gracious in providing a taxi that drove us straight to the entrance of the church – Grace Assembly of God.

However, we were already a bit drenched. Rebecca’s left sleeve was almost totally wet & Chai Ling’s back was a bit wet too. Both of them were sheltering under the same small umbrella, see. As I was sheltering myself with my own umbrella (I don’t know why Rebecca decided to share the umbrella with Chai Ling), my attire wasn’t really wet, but my shoes were a little soaked. Of course, needless to say, the girls’ footwear were thoroughly drenched too.

This ‘drama’ starred 4 couples who do not know each other at all. The lady conducting this acted-out pre-marital counseling was named Christy. She looked very much like Lye Lee Fong & even sounded like her. Except the obvious evidence that she was taller & didn’t have that small a nose… =)

Several scenes were filmed & it was rather comical at some scenes. From the need for Christy to stand still without moving about, so as not to step out of the camera view… to one couple trying their best to look & sound angry while acting out a conflict resolution incident.

For once, I began to get a small ‘taste’ of how tiring it can be to act. Sometimes several takes had to be shot & scenes repeated a few times. Furthermore, as the actors & actresses get tired over time, we still had to try to portray a cheerful face during those filming scenes. The microphone that was attached to the video camera was very, very sensitive. It could pick up the slightest twitch of sound e.g. our quiet breathing. Or some of us (like me) were having a bit of a blocked nose.

But overall, it was a good experience. Chai Ling gave us a Bengawan Solo $5 voucher & we were surprised. Later, Rebecca told me that her family isn’t very well to do… & that made me appreciate her efforts all the more. She has a kind & considerate heart. Thank God for her…

Facing my prickly fears

Finally… I decided to pluck up the courage to make an attempt at blood donation. I had been afraid of needles almost all my life. I mean, why should anyone love to be pricked & poked? Isn’t it a painful experience? Not that I don’t think so after my successful blood donation today, but this experience was indeed a good one.

Rebecca & I met to go to the Health & Science Authority (HSA) building at Outram Park. This building used to be called the ‘Blood Bank’. But the name was changed over time as perhaps it seemed to sound intimidating to those who may be considering blood donation.

On the MRT journey there, I suddenly had a stomachache. I’m not sure whether it was because I was afraid or maybe my breakfast at Bedok Interchange hawker centre wasn’t very clean. Whichever it is, or even a combination of both, I was glad to ease myself at the toilet before I went for my blood donation. It definitely wasn’t worth getting myself any more uncomfortable than I already am.

Rebecca filled up the consent form very quickly, whereas I was very cautious about reading through before completing it. Oh well, she’s a regular blood donor. She submitted her consent form first & I put in my form much later. In fact, I was still reading & filling up my consent form when she came back after the doctor’s check-up. Can’t believe that I was so slow… but then again, what’s the hurry? Its not as if the nurses will stop me from donating blood when I have already submitted the consent form.

The chair that we were given to fill up the form looked like those chairs that I had when I was taking my secondary school examinations. It was interesting & refreshing to see these small tables with an even smaller attached table, after so many years. I talked to Rebecca a bit, before she suddenly brought up the shocking reality that there was going to be TWO injections! TWO?! All these while, I had the impression that it was only going to be one! That’s it… it shocked my mind & heart… but I did my best so steel myself & carried on filling the form.

Rebecca told me that she thinks I’m very brave. Not that this statement helped to make me feel any better, but at least… well… there was some good to come out of this suffering.

After my doctor’s check-up, I came back to my seat & we proceed to queue up to check our hemoglobin blood count. Rebecca failed this check (not surprisingly, though I didn’t cross my mind). Mine sank straight to the bottom of the container with blue liquid. Amazing! It was so cool just watching it sink & hit the bottom. Yeehaa! =)

Rebecca was suddenly disappointed. But then I realized – that I would be going into the blood transfusion room alone! OH! What have I got myself into? It was so sad… & at the same time frightening. I had wanted to go in with her, so at least I could look & talk to her, while trying to distract myself from this long-lasting fearful experience. I told Rebecca to pray for me & soon, the nurse called my name. In my heart, I thought to myself – this is it… I’m gone…

I was hesitant about going into the room. Worse still, alone. After stepping through the door, I had thoughts of just walking straight out & leave the building. I mean, what is this? I came for this & expected some company during this ordeal & now I’m left all alone? I’m like a sheep walking voluntarily to the slaughter!

My mind was quite a blank, as I walked slowly to a big cushioned chair ushered to me. I told the nurse that I wanted to do it on my left hand. I got myself seated, but my heart was thumping. No joke… it was. As I waited for the nurse to attend to me, I really felt like a lamb waiting to be slaughtered. But this ‘lamb’ walked into the ‘slaughter house’ voluntarily.

So there I lay, waiting & waiting… My right palm began to sweat & it was really starting to feel moist. I can’t believe this is happening. I tried to think back to those times when I went to a hospital & prepared for an operation… all the while trying to use these thoughts to console myself.

In the end, the nurse finally came. Oh man, I’m gone… gone… I asked her in Mandarin whether it’s painful & she laughed. She told me that if I’m afraid, then I don’t have to look. It didn’t help when I saw the plump lady to my left smiling to herself… & I’m sure she was quietly laughing at me. Oh dear, what embarrassment! I was definitely the most tensed blood donor in the room. Everyone else was relaxing, talking & some just waiting for everything to be over. And there I was, head tilted forward, shoulders tensed, eyes afraid… until that same nurse walked over & tried to coax me into leaning backwards to rest my neck. I really felt like a chicken there…

First, the nurse applied this yellowish liquid around the targeted skin surface area. Next, she gave me the injection to numb my vein. I winched inside my heart when it poked into my vein & squirmed in my body as she depressed the syringe, allowing the liquid to flow into my vein. In a few seconds, it was over… but I knew that the worse has yet to come. She was going to inject another bigger needle. And the needle was going to stay there for 5 – 10 minutes. I really didn’t want to think about it. I felt like a poultry that was about to die… Thinking back, I wonder if I’m now better able to identify with poultry. Hmm…

This is it. The nurse came over with a larger needle, attached the empty packet of blood & this time, I really closed my eyes & looked away. Honestly, I didn’t know how my facial expression looked like, but it wasn’t as if I cared at that point of time. In it went… & a sense of relieve overtook me. The needle was in!

I was told to occasionally clench this rubber ball that was held in my left palm. It was scary to see my blood just flowing & flowing into the previously empty packet. It was filling up… quite fast, in fact. I wondered if I should clench the rubber ball, but then I decided not to. I figured that with my blood pressure at that point of time, I don’t think I needed to induce anymore pressure to make my precious life blood flow out any faster.

The nurse occasionally came over to ask how I was feeling & I think that by now, some of the nurses would have seen my ‘frozen with fear’ facial expression. I tried to read the pamphlets that had been passed to me & wished that it would all be over soon, as my heart has not stopped cringing ever since I stepped in. As usual, that plump lady to my left was smiling to herself. Sometimes she looked at me, sometimes she just smiled to herself. What the heck? Rejoicing at my suffering? Huh! I bet that there is something that she’s afraid of in life…

After 5 – 10 minutes, it was over. Another nurse came to ask how I’m feeling & began cutting off the small connecting hose between the needle & the packet of blood. I thought it was over. No no no… I was wrong! She took out FOUR test-tube looking containers & told me that she was going to draw more blood for FOUR other tests! FOUR?! Hello! You are going to take more blood?!

Not like I had a choice, so I just resigned to my fate & let her collect more blood. I tried to feel my blood leaving my body, but I couldn’t really feel it. But what the heck? It WAS flowing out of my body. My life blood was draining away. I just sat there & looked at the ‘vampire’ nurse draining away more blood. It was quite a sad moment…

Finally! I was left alone to apply pressure on the fresh hole created by HSA’s big needle. Thank God that there was ‘whatever that chemical’ to numb the pain. If not, I would really walk out of the room. It was a big needle, no joke.

So I pressed & pressed the open wound, till one of the nurses came to wrap up that area with a purple colored pressure tape, which was meant to hold the cotton wire gauze in place for the next hour or so. It looked cute, with smiley faces on it. The best thing – it was reusable, or so as Rebecca had told me.

I walked out beaming like a champion. I have survived the ordeal. It was the feeling like a Prisoner Of War (POW) returning to their homeland. Nay, maybe it wasn’t that extreme, but it was quite an exhilarating feeling, though as usual, I did my best to mask it & walked calmly towards Rebecca. I was thankful that she was praying for me, though I’m not sure if I liked the part where she was imagining me screaming, shouting & rushing about in the room. Huh… =)

My generosity & care for my GF took over. We walked over to have some refreshment. I asked the young chap (who was tending the stall) about what I could exchange my coupon for. He told me that I was entitled to one drink & either a pastry (only left one doughnut) or a cheese sandwich. Rebecca wanted a hot Milo & cheese sandwich, so I got these for her.

As we sat down at one of the tables, apparently I realized that the experience was still fresh in my mind. It also seemed like I was functioning on adrenalin which hasn’t subsided yet. Even the jeans material at the back of my knee caps was a bit wet. Apparently, I didn’t just sweat at my right hand.

Both of us were shocked to see 1WO Tan Wee Seng’s photo on one of the posters advertising for blood donation. I saw that familiar face first then told Rebecca. I even took a photo of it with my handphone camera.

So this is a brief account of my experience of donating blood. I’m not sure if I would go back again, but who knows… maybe I would…

Away from the shelter

My 7 months of work as a temp staff at Cuppage was indeed a 'shelter'. Uncle John was like a guardian angel sent by God to watch over me. Several times I flopped & was clearly ill-disciplined, rash, impatient & demanding... but I don't remember him ever being wavered in his position to be there to turn the situation around for me.

Today is my first day as a perm staff of StarHub Ltd. Much to my surprise & thankfulness, I was actually able to wake up at 6:50am, right when my handphone alarm sounded... especially when I had slept at 1:25am the night before. I lazed till 6:58am before getting up, said a few words of prayer & went to wash up. It was the first time I had actually woken up this early, since... I don't know how long ago. I didn't even wake up this early during my SIM days, so I can't really figure out when was the last time that I actually woke up this early. *Laugh*... I took bus 55 straight to my office located at a building referred to as 'Da Vinci Holdings'. I was early. The receptionist was still looking sleepy, not that I wasn't... yet the anxiety kept me relatively awake.

While waiting for the reception area, I met this guy who soon walked in after me. He introduced himself as 'Benson'... a new temp staff who was also going to begin his first day at Tai Seng. I thought back to myself - Yup, there was a point of time when I was still a temp staff. Several months in fact. So I understood this kind of stigmatization where temp staffs are sometimes perceived as dispensable at work. Benson saw this other man who walked past & called loudly to him. Soon both perm staff & new temp staff were talking like old friends. They must have known each other for some time. Yet this fella Benson didn't seem the least bothered that his voice thundered at the reception area. Indeed, his voice sounded like he was absolutely comfortable & seasoned in this new workplace. Obviously he wasn’t... just like me... but it didn’t look as if he cared...

After about 20 minutes, senior HR executive Elaine Loh came out to greet me, before ushering me into a meeting room where I passed her my official employment documents, as well as my photocopied education certificates & testimonials. She explained to me about the choice of either getting a free $400 handphone voucher or a $200 cable TV voucher that can be deducted from the subscriber's monthly bills, for up till one year. I told her that I'll take both forms & decide on which to take up in future. Then she told me to wait outside the meeting room, while she explained the whole process again to another new perm staff by the name of Chai Poh Lin. Soon after, I realised that Poh Lin was a new perm staff that's going to join my department!

Elaine brought us to the 6th floor whereby she introduced me to Mary Lim, confidential secretary of Wholesale department. I still remembered clearly that Mary looked quite surprised when I gave her a firm hand-shake. I'm not sure if she considered that as an assertive move, but I suppose non-verbal expression does play a crucial part in making up the first impression of an individual. At that instance, I began to wonder if I had made a wrong move. Hmm...

Next, Mary passed us each a plastic bag stuck with several pieces of huge scotch-tape. It was our personal stationery pack. It contained a hole-puncher, a regular-sized staple, staple bullets, red pen, black pen, blue pen, ruler, mechanical pencil & foolscap pad. Each of us was also given our personal secure PC password login.I chatted with Mary a bit while Poh Lin was shown to her desk. Mary introduced me to the Vice President (Andrew Grenville) in his office & for the first time, I realised that I was actually talking to an ‘ang moh’ co-worker (just that this person happened to be the big boss in this department). I was quite dumbstruck as I couldn't really adjust to his speaking ascent. It was obvious that I didn't know what to say, as I just stood there & looked at him. Sensing this awkward moment, he welcomed me, shook my hand & I walked out.

I was given a personal laptop to bring to my desk, which happened to be one right next to Celia Liu, my upperstudy who had recently been converted into an (External) Account Manager, while at the meantime juggling with the Internal AM responsibilities. I didn't know how to set up my laptop so Mary asked for one of the managers to help me. Quite a friendly guy, though I can't remember his name. Soon, my laptop was up & running... =)

At about past 9am, Celia came in & we introduced ourselves. She began clearing some of her work, while I sorted out the configurations & preferences on my laptop. Then she began teaching me the broad overview of my job scope. It was a complete blur to me, as I really didn't have any prior knowledge nor work experience in all these technical gadgets & services. I figured - most of the staff here have engineering background, that's why.Celia is a nice girl, just one year older than me. Attractive too... In fact, I kind-of like her soft-spoken & slightly hoarse voice whenever she talks. I don't know... somehow the soft-spoken & slightly hoarse feminine voice just sound rather quietly sexy to me. As a whole, I found that she looks very much like Abigail Lim from Clayworks CG back at Christ Methodist Church. Almost identical figure, hair length & style, as well as her manner of speaking. The only obvious physical difference is her facial features… & of course the observable fact that she really smiles a lot. Other than that, Celia really looks rather like Abigail.

After some time of work, I realised that it was lunch-time. It seemed that people in this department go for lunch rather early. Back at Cuppage, I go for lunch at about 12:30pm. Here, people go for lunch as late as 12pm. Some start leaving the office as early as 11:45am, especially on Fridays. I'm not sure if this is supposed to be something to be glad about, but I guess it’s also good since I have a very small breakfast nowadays, as I think that there is no food to buy near my office, so early in the morning.

Gladys, the Business Support Manager, brought Poh Lin, Serena, Nicole, Celia & myself to Crystal Jade restaurant at Parkway Parade for a welcome lunch. I was utterly shocked when I heard that 6 of us are sharing two cabs there & back. Initially, I didn't know that it was a welcome lunch & thought to myself - "Oh no! This group of people really eats expensive food!" I felt a bit awkward too, as I was the only guy in the group.

When we entered the restaurant, I felt odd at the fact that I’m actually going to have a tim-sum lunch with 5 other women whom I do not know at all. The small order sheet was passed around & a few of us ticked a few choice tim-sum dishes. Then we began talking. Topics like what area of work I was doing at Cuppage, etc. You know, those typical ice-breaker type of questions. Then we ate. I didn’t appear really pass food around as I didn’t know whether it was appropriate to take food for another woman whom I do not yet know. So I just ate by myself & talked a little bit.

After lunch, we took a cab back to the office. Gladys & Celia were sitting with me. Gladys suddenly mentioned that she heard me say that I am a Christian over lunch. I confirmed the answer to her question & we began talking a little bit about church & stuff. I learnt that she is quite irregular about going to church, yet she used to attend church last time. I was glad to discover that at least there is one Christian in my new workplace.

The afternoon went on as I tried my best to pick up the loads of information on products & processes. Celia was patient in coaching me, though she was busy juggling her own work as external AM. I felt like I was back to my first 2 weeks on a new job at Cuppage when I was in the fax-in team. Just that this time it was tougher. I soon realized that mobile is so much less complicated than data & network products.

I heaved a sigh of relieve when I packed up & left the office. I had survived my first day at Tai Seng. I was glad that it was about 40 minutes of a single bus ride home. Apparently, I had left my laptop on my desk after I left for home. The next morning, Celia told me that she was shocked that I left it lying on my desk. She warned me that the cleaner or someone else could have stolen it. She reminded me that I was given a key to my locked cupboard & she advised me to store my laptop inside for safe-keeping before I leave everyday. I had learnt a new thing. Thank God that she was kind enough to tell me… =)

Living the 'Rocky' legend

Sylvester Stallone has done it again. Well, at least he has successfully made that impression on me. The script writer of the award-winning movie 'Rocky' has recently produced a reality TV series, titled 'The Contender', aiming to re-capture the passion of boxing in the hearts of people all around the world. Showing on the AXN channel of StarHub SCV, this show really proves to bring the story of 'Rocky' into real-life.

I still remember reading several articles re-counting the time when Sylvester Stallone pen-down his personal movie script for the movie 'Rocky' & being turned down by the Hollywood movie-makers. Sly wrote it out of deep conviction for the real-life boxer 'Rocky Marciano'. Similar to the movie script, Sly hoped to reflect the life of the 'Rocky Marciano' through the movie character 'Rocky Balboa'. As an underdog, 'Rocky' was given a chance & a shot at the heavyweight title of the world. In the movie, the opposing boxer was 'Apollo Creed'. Thinking back to the movie 'Rocky', my heart goes out to all the underdogs in all kinds of sports all around the world, each hoping for a chance to prove his/her worth in their area of sports.

And this is what Sly decided to do in filming 'The Contender'. The contenders are made up of 16 professional middleweight boxers from the East & West side of the US. Each coming from his own homeland to compete for the chance to become 'The Contender', who would finally get a chance to pit himself against the world's middleweight champion! Indeed a life-time opportunity not to be missed! Beyond simple words of description, Sly has really made the story of 'Rocky' come true. Not just in the movies that took the world by storm in the 1970s... he carried it further by making reality out of his script!

Think about it, how many movie-makers actually make reality out of their movie storyline? I'm referring to healthy & beneficial reality, of course... not those movies that focus viewers attention on terrorists or natural catastropes. By writing & filming 'The Contender', Sly managed to give a hope & an opportunity to all the sporting-hopefuls out there! Furthermore, through this series, he has once again managed to grip the hearts of many people out there, re-kindling the old passion for boxing in the arena.

Do not be mistaken, this show is not just for boxing fans alone, but even families out there. The life of these 16 contenders are also filmed in this show, giving viewers a chance to have a look at the lives of real-life professional career boxers. This is not a movie... its reality. We watch wives sit by the bed-side, watching their husbands during the night before their big fight, hearing the encouraging words that they say & even the emotions of the boxers themselves, as they re-count their passion & reason for going for 'The Contender'. Some do it to boost their boxing career ranking, some do it as a challenge to themselves, some do it solely to get the prize money of $1 million dollars because their family is poor.

Indeed, a portray of the real-life of boxers... right from the time when their family members shout & spur them on during the 1 minute interval fight break, till the end, when one fighter loses the fight. Wives tear, babies cry, fathers cheer, brothers hug... truly the spirit of boxing. Sly couldn't be any more proud of himself, for he has made & changed history once again.

Screeching CD-ROM drive

Pathetic... really pathetic. Gets on my nerves whenever I try to use it. My CD-ROM drive is really a pain in the butt. It pissed me off at the last 10 mins of watching 'The Land Before Time' VCD lent to me by Rebecca. With just so few mins left of the show, my CD-ROM drive began to screech & pause at the same time, almost every 3 seconds! Of course, its not the first time that this happened, but that's the point see... often enough until it justs irritates me. This stupid thing can just hang there, while the seconds roll-on. I mean, what the heck? Come on... hanging every 3 seconds is really agravating madness, especially towards the end of a show.

Actually, I had in mind to purchase a new PC desktop once I start my perm job, hopefully before the end of this month. I was thinking of getting it through Dell, since they allow me to pay by installments of about $120 - $180 per month. Not too bad, I thought... though I must check to see how much more do I need to pay by this mode of payment. Oh well... wait & see first...

This custom-built PC of mine (kindly constructed by Elgin Lam from my ex-Clayworks CG) have already lasted 5 years. From the ever-shortening 6 months life-cycle of new IT advancement, my PC have already lived through 10 life-cycles! In fact, it has already started to get cranky last year. Through the re-formating of the Windows platform & software (I can't do much about the hardware), I have already prolonged its survival for another 1 year. Now the hardware components are beginning to fall apart.

(1) Mouse can't move properly, (2) Only 1 speaker can produce sound, (3) Sub-woofer not working, (4) CD-ROM drive sometimes can't even read CD-R (much less watch a VCD), (5) 56K dial-up modem automatically does register on my PC every once in awhile, (6) CD-RW drive working at a very low writing speed, (7) USB ports on the motherboard occasionally loose & can't register external hardware, e.g. digital camera cable.

I really don't want to think about it anymore. I'll just try to revive it for as long as possible...

'Stretched' blessings

God really has His way of things in our lives. Often I really don't understand how He works in my life, much less wondering how He works in the lives of others.

I began sharing of this recent testimony of God's goodness in my life, when I told Rebecca that she's worth so much more than this blessing that God has most generously given. Indeed, Rebecca is really a gem uncommon in most parts of the developed world these days. People have become so complex that even our local Singaporean men are beginning to feel inferior & threatened by our local Singaporean women. I guess the habit (or worse still - addiction) for personal achievement, image & success does have its undesired detriments on people.

This testimony that I shared is with regards with the income that God has given me for my first & newest perm job beginning soon at StarHub (Tai Seng). I guess every company has its own salary scale, unlike the fixed salary ranges in the Civil Service. I wasn't sure how much to quote for my salary expectation when I applied for the perm position as Internal Account Manager of the Network Wholesale department at StarHub. At my third & final interview, the HR executive insisted that I state my salary expectation. I asked whether she knew what was the commonly expected range of salary for someone of my current qualifications & experience. She diverted my question & replied with another vague question. Giving up asking, I thought to myself for about 2 seconds then writing down $1,800 - $2,000.

In my mind, I was thinking - that's it... if the salary range is too high, I might not even get the job. Its just 'great' that she insisted that I put down my expected salary. Finally, after almost a week later, Kareen Lai (that HR executive) called to tell me that I've been selected & would be given a starting salary of $2,000. My heart jumped! But as usual, I played it cool... & replied casually that it was good & I'm glad to be selected for this position. I still remember trying to get this fact into my 'head' about being hired & paid $2,000 for the next 2 - 3 hrs. It was just unbelievable to me. All my life, I have faced so many rejections from schools, companies, etc. Acceptance is definitely not something common on my mind. In fact, it was extremely rare. Honestly, I wasn't used to it... =)

Coming back to this topic which I shared with Rebecca, I told her that God has been very generous to me about my starting salary. I gave the range of $1,800 - $2,000, worried stiff whether I would miss the job if I had quoted too high. Not only did God gave me this job, He even gave me the top choice salary that I asked for! Honestly, I still remember the night before the day which I was to expect a call from HR. I was consoling myself, saying "Nevermind, don't even think about the $2,000. Even if I'm given $1,800... it would still be much better than my current temp staff salary. Better than nothing. Its still good to get a perm job & start somewhere." Never did I expect that God was so generous to give me the top choice of my quoted salary!

Personally, I perceive blessings as something as beyond the basic needs of a person. That means to say, I'm currently already given a temp job with a fluctuating monthly 'per-hourly-paid' salary that lets me to get by from month to month, for the past 6 - 7 months at StarHub. Honestly, there wasn't much that I could save & yet I still gave to my parents. Once, I even gave them my monthly contribution even before I got that month's pay into my bank account. I chose to give by faith. I told God that nevermind, I'm still going to give my parents. If You are willing, You can bless me with more next time. If I'm right, that was before I got my perm job offer of $2,000.

So you see, God does see our heart's intentions, hopes & dreams. Even if we think He doesn't see or care. It may be difficult to trust at times (I've been upset about my pathetic temp staff pay for more than half a year), I even got depressed of the lack of opportunities available to me, etc. I was on the verge of giving up hope, wondering what the heck am I going to work & spending my life hours away for a few miserable dollars an hour. But still, that doesn't change the fact that God watches over us day & night... & sees His plans for our lives. In short, our moods don't change God's plans for us. Simple, yet meaningful point to note.

Thus, based on my definition of the measure which I'm given before I conclude myself as being blessed by God, this incident is a classic example of God giving me more than what I need. In fact, He even gave me what I wanted. Not just the salary range that I asked for, but the TOP salary that I prayed about! I mean, I really didn't wish to keep up my hopes before the news was broken to me. Why keep my hopes up? Every time I do so, I get disappointed. 98% of the time. Where is my faith when I need it? Nay... I was already depressed & couldn't trust God much anymore, so I just left my situation in His hands. And at that low point of my life, God showed me how much He can choose to bless me. Anything... as long as He chooses to. And this time, He gave me the most of what I hoped & asked for.

It was truly shocking... God gave me what I wanted! The most of what I wanted! Gosh! I think it really seldom happens in my life, that's why I can get this shocked. *Quiet chuckle*. Furthermore, God has been slowly revealing more about this new workplace that I would be moving to very soon. Just two days ago, I was referred to a colleague named Alvin Lee, who is a Christian & attends one of the Christian Fellowship at Tai Seng! When I first heard it, it didn't cross my mind what time it starts & ends, or whether or not I would attend. I was just glad that I was introduced to a fellow brother in Christ at Tai Seng, via E-MAIL. I was glad that there are fellow believers in my new workplace, even though he was from a different department. Nevermind, I'm still thankful. Thank you, God. =)

Demon casting out demon

Jerald Toh Wee Meng. That's the name of the man.

Uncle John, Chai Joo & I were looking around for seats at the Orchard Meridian foodcourt when we stumbled upon Ong Boon Aun (Japanese sector), Wilfred Goh (Hospitality sector) & Jerald Toh (IT/Media sector). See... that's the usefulness of doing database administration... It makes (not just helps) me remember names & surnames, etc. *Big grin*.

Somehow, after I had closed my eyes for like 3 seconds & said my grace before eating, these Account Managers (AM) began talking about going to church. I found out that Boon Aun & Jerald were Christians, currently attending New Creation Church (also called 'The Rock'). In fact, they had just invited Wilfred over on Sunday! Somehow despite how 'lukewarm' I may feel about myself as a Christian, it still sparks me up a bit whenever I hear of someone being invited to church! It was like "Tada! There's an opportunity!" rang in my mind. Marvelous... terrific... Thank God for the openness of Wilfred.

After a short while of eating & chatting, I turned towards Jerald & asked how long he's been a Christian. He told me - about 4 years. Somehow... & I really mean somehow... he began a remark that he's probably one of the people in this world who had the weirdest experience of becoming a Christian. He basically just walked into a church one Wednesday afternoon & told the pastor that he wanted to be saved.

At first, I thought to myself, well... It not that weird... June Loh from Christ Methodist Church also walked into church by herself one day, began attending the services & later decided to become a Christian. So far, I think she's growing okay in the Lord. But wait... Jerald Toh was different. And I really mean different. Here's an account of his story...

From young, Jerald had the supernatural ability to see demonic spirits around him. It was only later in life that he realised that it was this coin with a square-hole in it, that caused this demon possession in him, at a very young age. I think it was because he found this coin & chose to keep it with him. He said that when he found it, it was black in colour. However, after some time when he kept it with him, it turned gold... pure gold in colour.

He began seeing evil spirits all around, on the streets, while riding a bike, walking with friends, at altars in his friends' house, etc. He said that the demons that he saw around seemed to come in threes, taking on all sorts of shapes & sizes. Anything from how a little kid can draw a demon, to a real physical image of a person (e.g. a deceased individual). However one can imagine it, it could look like that... coz its all about human imagination.

On top of having this supernatural ability to see such 'things', Jerald was also very rich. He doesn't know where all the money came from, but it just seemed to keep pouring in. My guess was that perhaps its the Devil's way of continually trying to keep him within its grasp. Afterall, the love of money is the root of all evil.

I was shocked to hear that (before he became a Christian) when he walked, he could see a little demon perched on his back. He could even see its shadow while walking. Surprisingly, his GF could also see that shadow. I wonder why. When it rained, he was never afraid coz there was always something covering overhead. He never got wet outside. Never. I asked if he ever tried swimming & he said that he did... once. The moment he went into the pool, he jumped out coz he saw many, many dead bodies floating in the pool! It shocked me... maybe many people died in the pool before. He grabbed his clothes & left the pool.

Later on in life, he realised that he had a very high ranking demon inside him. He shared that even demons have ranks. With it, he could command demon(s) out of his friends' houses. He wasn't afraid when he ran into demons on the street. He just told them to go & they did. Boon Aun & I were so shocked that our mouths were just open, as we listened to his sharing. He didn't seem to look like he's making up a story. His face was so calm & true to what he shared. Back in my mind, I was glad that Wilfred was there listening to this. It would be a good testimony to encourage him, especially when he's going to their church this Sunday.

Jerald then stumbled upon a girl whom he liked & wanted to date her out. To our surprise, he said that she wasn't a Christian, but her favourite book is the Bible. We couldn't understand why... In fact, how can a non-Christian find the Bible as his / her favourite book, when he / she wouldn't even want to believe in Jesus. He found that strange too, but I guess God works in strange ways at times. And you know what? That girl made him memorise scripture verses whenever he wanted to date her out! I was utterly shocked! Never had I heard such an odd happening!

But it turned out for the good, as slowly these verses began to speak to Jerald. I don't know how, but over time it did. I'm not so sure what else happened in between, but soon after, he decided that he wanted to become a Christian, so he walked into a church (I can't remember which church) one Wednesday afternoon & spoke to the pastor.

After hearing his story, the pastor told him to go back & come back on this date, Friday the 13th, which was 2 days away, so that a group of church people could pray for him. I can't remember why the pastor said that. Anyway, so Jerald went home & for the next 2 days, he fell sick, vomitting lots of water, feeling weak, etc. On the Friday, he called the pastor & told him that he couldn't go to church coz he was sick & weak. The pastor simply said "l'll see you in church" & hanged up the phone.

Jerald wasn't sure how, but he managed to draw himself out of his home & went to the road to call a cab. Strangely, there was already a cab waiting at the road! Nobody called the cab & neither did he. So he got in & the cab driver just drove off, bringing him to the church. And Jerald didn't even tell the cab driver where he wants to go! Furthermore, he was still vomitting in the cab & the driver didn't even say anything! Upon reaching the church entrance, Jerald got out of the cab, holding two bags of vomit & the cab driver just drove off. He didn't have to pay for the trip! I thought that it was shockingly amazing! It was like an angel giving him a ride! God literally brought him to the church!

Jerald walked slowly (he was still sick & weak) towards the church entrance. Just as he walked through the entrance, he stood up & suddenly realised that he was okay & started wondering why he was carrying these two bags of vomit! He couldn't remember why he was carrying these vomit!

The pastor brought him into the church & a group of people began praying for him. After the session of prayer, the pastor asked him what does he see. Jerald said that he saw a dark cave & the demons in it... but one escaped. And he heard a voice that said "I'll be back". He didn't turn back to his ways after that. Now if he sees a demon, he no longer sees them in all sorts of shapes & kinds, but he sees them as one kind of image. I'm still quite confused about this, but that's not really the most important point to me.

Through this testimony, I felt encouraged that God still works in His own special way. It doesn't matter how man tries to intervene. God has His way of getting His plan done. It encouraged me further because God could even make such 'difficult' people in messy circumstances change & turn around. There's really nothing that He cannot do.

Later in the afternoon, I e-mailed Jerald & told him that I felt encouraged by his sharing. Honestly, to me, he doesn't even look like the kind of guy who would be troubled by such happenings in his life. He seems to have a straight looking face, seldom smiling, yet confident in speech & stance. Never did I realise that he went through so much in his life.

I told Jerald in my e-mail that everything happens for a reason & God allowed such things to happen so that he can see His work in his life. I encouraged him to share his testimony & give God the glory. Indeed, it was truly an inspiring testimony. Before I coincidently met up with these AMs during lunch time, I thought I was in quite a bad state in my Christian life. I just didn't know what to do about myself. I feel lost & perplexed at times, especially when I begin to brood about it. But from hearing this testimony, my heart felt lifted & encouraged because I'm sure God has His plan for my life, even how He plans to grow me through my experiences in life, be it big or small. In the end, Jerald's testimony brought glory to God & I praise Him for the work that He is doing in all our lives.