Pre-Marital Counseling – Intro Session

Rebecca and I went to visit her Dad after church service. He looked better and said that being put on drip made him feel more refreshed. I agree… somehow it does make me feel better when I had my sinusitis and tonsillitis surgery back in the year 2000.

Thereafter, we headed back to church for our first introductory session of premarital counseling. It was organized by an inter-denominational ministry of married volunteers with the heart to teach and guide pre-married couples. The course was held at the room at basement (next to the YA room) and about 8 – 9 couples turned up.

This course was led by Raj and his wife Josephine (but she was not able to make it last Sunday). There was a relatively thin booklet given out to us, of which we had to pay $50 for the whole 8 weeks course.

This first session was more of a simple ‘get-to-know-each-other’ time, and the laying down of rules for attending this course. For example, a couple must attend all 8 sessions to ‘graduate’ from this premarital counseling program. Also, there was a rule that this course is only open to individuals who have not been married before, coz if both or one party has been married before; there would be another course for them to attend.

There was this registration sheet which each couple was supposed to fill up, and one of the questions asked whether this is the couple’s first time planning to get married. Rebecca wrote ‘Yes’ for her part and when it came to my part, I tried to tease by saying, “No lah… it’s my second time getting married…”

It so tickled my heart to see her facial expression whenever I tease her, such that I persisted in insisting that this is not my first time planning to get married. Finally, Rebecca decided to write ‘No’ for me… and I was shocked! I became frantic and told her to write correctly leh… coz even canceling can be awkward to the course facilitator when he actually sees our registration form! Hahahaha… I didn’t expect Rebecca to be so daringly humorous! *Laugh*… =)

Time passed rather quickly, though I found the teaching not very in-depth and the booklet given out not much of a read. There were more blank pages than pages with words! I might as well bring my own notebook! Sigh…

Deep in my mind, I was pondering whether this course is too simplistic and general for Rebecca and I, coz being the person that I am, we have already brought up many of such issues to discuss beforehand.

After the session ended, I walked back into the room to ask Raj if there was any good book or material that he could recommend as additional reading. I really wanted to find out more, and not just attend a simple and general course. To my horror, Raj said that he does not know of any! I was stunned! How can he not know of any! Does he even read? Where does he get his material to share with us? He doesn’t even know a single book to recommend for further reading? Where does the material in this booklet come from then?

I was disappointed, really. I am not sure if Rebecca sensed it, but I was glad to hear that she raised a question as to whether we would like to also attend the premarital counseling course organized by MCYS. I would love too! More teaching and guidance wouldn’t harm! But let us complete these 8 weeks first. I really hope it won’t be too simple and non-specific. After all, we are talking about a life-time commitment here…