Only Warm Honey…

I felt thirsty after my bath this Saturday night, so I took a walk to my kitchen intending to make my favorite honey drink. It so happened that the small container was empty and there was no honey left… so I opened the refrigerator to see a huge bottle of honey and lime concentrate inside!

My heart jumped for joy at that instant, but this feeling was short-lived. I soon realized that this type of honey and lime concentrate had to be mixed with cold water... and it tasted terrible with cold water from the refrigerator! I took a few sips and quickly poured it away into the kitchen sink!

Cold honey drink tastes awful! So I learnt my lesson – I would only want to drink honey mixed with warm / hot water… but not in COLD water! Urgh!

The Snipping Barber

Last night, I went to another barber to cut my hair coz the usual barber that I usually go to had closed for the day. This was my first time patronizing this particular barber, but my hair was really getting a bit thick, so I decided to give it a try with this barber.

I noticed that this barber looked rather senior in age, but it didn’t bother me much, until he began to cut my hair. He was an extremely SLOW barber! Snip a little her, snip a little there… wah, I tell you… the hair that fell down on the wrapped plastic covering sheet were all so SMALL! Tiny strains of hair! And there he was, changing to another type of shaver blade every 1 – 2 minutes! Why on earth is he doing this? I came her expecting for a quick and good haircut, but why is taking such a long, long time?! I was really feeling pissed off while sitting still on the barber chair.

And another uncomfortable thing that he does, whenever he tries to trim the sides of my head, is to hold onto the TIP of that particular side of my ear, while continuing his excellently SLOW hair trimming! It was annoying and I didn’t like that experience one bit! I will definitely think twice about going there again! Aiyoh!

Principal Kway?

About a week ago, Rebecca and I arranged to meet up for dinner at Parkway Parade. As usual, we would meet up at our usual spot outside MPH. However, once again, Rebecca didn’t fail to amuse me…

In her reply SMS to me, she typed “… Pkway MPH…” When I saw that I laughed and replied her SMS asking who this “Principal Kway” was. It wasn’t difficult for her to guess coz school teachers refer to their principal as the ‘P’.

Okay, this isn’t much of a joke… but I was just trying to be funny that day. Maybe I was feeling really stressed at work, which most often I am. Stiff shoulders are my most common ailment. Hmm…

Silenced My Phone?

Two Thursdays ago, on 14th Sep, I received a phone call from my brother (from Bangkok) while I was in the midst of chatting with Rebecca on the home phone. I don’t know why, but pressed the ‘cancel’ button and cancelled the phone call.

And when I returned back to my phone call with Rebecca, she uttered these strange yet comical words, “You silenced your phone? ‘Kiow(4) Kiow(4)’ already ah?” I roared with laughter! You see, that’s her… sometimes she just says funny things that bring such smiles and laughter into my heart! What a great gal! =)

In case, anyone of you might be wondering – No, I did not ignore that call. I knew it was my brother (although I still can’t figure out why right at that instant, I suddenly pressed the ‘cancel’ button), so I told my Mum to return his call. He was on his entrepreneurial trip to Thailand… =)

Delightful Food…

Last Sunday’s sermon was preached by Pastor Keith titled ‘The Discovery of Delight’, in other words, learning to delight in God. It was a rather meaningful sermon message except for one point that made Rebecca and I laugh quite a bit!

Under the sub-heading of ‘The Resources of Delight’, there were 2 portions of scripture taken from John 4:32-34 (stating ‘food’ which refers to God’s word) and John 4:35 (referring to having a vision from what we see around us).

Rebecca miswrote both key words and swapped them interchangeably around, making the verse John 4:35 that read “… open your eyes and look around…” refer to the sub-heading of ‘Delightful Food’! When I pointed that out, both of us laughed and laughed in the middle of the sermon! Hahahaha… =)

MEH?

Yay! Rebecca’s Dad has been discharged from the Mount Elizabeth Hospital! Rebecca and I have been addressing this hospital as ‘MEH’ for the past week. Thinking back, it was such a comical way of stating the hospital in 3 short alphabets! Rebecca pointed out that it sounded like an exclaiming of the Singlish word ‘meh?’ *Laugh*… =)

But thank God… It has been about 2 weeks of suffering for him. A very torturing time for him and I really admire Rebecca’s Mum too, who stood steadfast without complain, from start till his recovery. What amazing strength and love between husband and wife. Testimony…

The Day I Turned 26

This Monday was the day that I turned 26 years of age. To be exact, at 10:33am, according to what was stated in my childhood health booklet! I am always proud to announce the actual time that I was born!

I had expected and looked forward to this day being a happy and enjoyable day. But where was I on Monday? I was working at my office desk! It was rather disappointing that I was hard at work on my actual birth date, but I tried to cast that thought aside coz Rebecca’s Dad was hospitalized, so we decided to cancel my birthday outing on that day.

I knew that it was a responsible and considerate thing to do, and I was glad that I made that conscious effort and decision. Yet, I still felt sore about it coz my birthday only comes around ONCE in a year… and I had planned and looked forward to this day, where I could enjoy a long weekend and celebrate my birthday at the same time! In the end, I didn’t have a long weekend and I didn’t get to celebrate my birthday on the day itself. It was such a demoralized feeling when I logged into the staff intranet to cancel my leave application. And my heart let out a sigh when I clicked the ‘cancel leave’ button.

As if I wasn’t feeling bad enough, every Monday was our weekly KPI reporting department meeting… and I was scolded really harshly by my Dept Head. Being the most senior in the Projects Department, I was always called upon first to report on my achievements for the past week. Occasionally, I performed well… and once in awhile, I would get scolded for something. It so happened that last week was such a hectic week that there were tasks that I could not complete. Because of this, I could not give a reasonable update to my assigned tasks and got YELLED at by my Dept Head. He even banged the table and shouted at me.

I just sat there quietly while the scolding went on, each thundering sentence lowering my esteem into an even deeper end, while my subconscious mind continued to dwell on the disappointment of not being able to enjoy my birthday. My mind started to wonder off, thinking whether it was better than I came to work today to get blasted on my birthday, or whether it was better to enjoy my birthday then come back to work the next day and get blasted. I could not decide on which was better… so I decided to wake myself out of this train of thought, coz I was indeed and already at work on my birthday. And I was getting a huge railing at, on this 26th birthday of mine. Once a year and I had to get screamed at first thing in the morning… and it wasn’t even 10:33am yet. Sigh…

As I walked back to the office area together with my colleagues (after the department meeting), my mind was still in a daze from all that had happened in this supposedly-happy birthday morning. My mind was rudely awakened when I heard my colleague Brenda suddenly exclaimed, “Wah! Its 11 o’clock already! And I haven’t done any work yet!” That shook me up from my daze and I decided to accept this reality and hastened myself to get on with work.

Surprisingly, things soon took a slight turn for a better, when I received this e-mail from the Finance Dept Head, telling me to come and collect my Confirmation Letter from her! My heart jumped, but I was afraid of whether there would be any pay increment. But I decided not to expect and when to collect this document. Upon receiving it, I brisk walked to the toilet to open it, coz I was afraid of what I might see and I wasn’t sure how I would respond.

While walking to the toilet, my mind raced and started to think about how I would feel and how Iong I would decide to stay in this company, if there wasn’t any pay increment (after all, I had taken a pay cut to take on this new job). It turned out that God is good… and He granted me a 10% pay increment, which I am thankful for, though it was still lower than my previous salary. But still, that was better than nothing. At least I could save up more for my new flat and wedding.

Despite receiving my confirmation, the glooming feeling remained throughout the day, though I tried to portray that I was seemingly feeling alright. I didn’t know if it worked, but I didn’t bother to find out. And as if things weren’t bad enough, I even had to work through lunch hour coz there was just too much work to be done.

As I was nodding a little bit in front of my PC, I was astonished to be suddenly presented with a red packet from the admin staff, saying that it was my birthday and it’s a small gift from the company! I was surprised at this gesture coz I never expected such a practice! I wasn’t even sure if this was even stated in our HR or admin company policy! (Later at home, I opened the red packet to find $12 inside! I laughed coz it reminded me that it was almost enough to cover the cost of a taxi trip to office! Hahahaha…)

My colleague Steven was shocked to hear that today was my birthday, and he said, “Wow… that was a bad start to the morning…” Yeah, tell me about it. I don’t wish to be reminded about how it all started on the morning of my birthday…

But it wasn’t very long before my next surprise came about when I was greeted by a small birthday cake with a candle on top, as my colleagues started to quietly sing and clap to the song ‘Happy Birthday’ right smack in the middle of Monday afternoon! It was indeed really a surprise (a bit more of a shock than surprise) to me, but I was happy! My colleague John also took the opportunity to snap a few photos with his digital camera and sent to my department colleagues! What a pleasant surprise!

Towards the end of the work day, a few of my colleagues urged me to quickly go off to celebrate my birthday. Some asked if I were meeting my girlfriend for dinner and I said yes. Yet, in my heart, I was still feeling a bit gloomy. It was true that I was meeting my girlfriend, and for dinner… but I was meeting her and her sister at Mount Elizabeth Hospital and buying packet dinner for both of them! But how could I tell my colleagues who were in high spirits after surprising me with a small birthday cake? I couldn’t bring myself to tell the real truth, but I didn’t really want to anyway. Coz I didn’t know how they would react when I said that I am going to the hospital instead of celebrating my birthday.

Rebecca’s Dad appeared quite alright and I spoke to him a little while to find out how he is feeling. It seemed that he still had difficulty recovering well and had to continue to stay at the hospital for a few more days. But even so, we were all glad that at least he was staying at the hospital, and not at home, without the proper care of nurses. Hmm… so that was how I ‘celebrated’ my 26th birthday.

Oh well, I don’t know whether to call it a happy or sad birthday, but I guess it was both. But I am thankful to still be alive to celebrate it…

Pre-Marital Counseling – Intro Session

Rebecca and I went to visit her Dad after church service. He looked better and said that being put on drip made him feel more refreshed. I agree… somehow it does make me feel better when I had my sinusitis and tonsillitis surgery back in the year 2000.

Thereafter, we headed back to church for our first introductory session of premarital counseling. It was organized by an inter-denominational ministry of married volunteers with the heart to teach and guide pre-married couples. The course was held at the room at basement (next to the YA room) and about 8 – 9 couples turned up.

This course was led by Raj and his wife Josephine (but she was not able to make it last Sunday). There was a relatively thin booklet given out to us, of which we had to pay $50 for the whole 8 weeks course.

This first session was more of a simple ‘get-to-know-each-other’ time, and the laying down of rules for attending this course. For example, a couple must attend all 8 sessions to ‘graduate’ from this premarital counseling program. Also, there was a rule that this course is only open to individuals who have not been married before, coz if both or one party has been married before; there would be another course for them to attend.

There was this registration sheet which each couple was supposed to fill up, and one of the questions asked whether this is the couple’s first time planning to get married. Rebecca wrote ‘Yes’ for her part and when it came to my part, I tried to tease by saying, “No lah… it’s my second time getting married…”

It so tickled my heart to see her facial expression whenever I tease her, such that I persisted in insisting that this is not my first time planning to get married. Finally, Rebecca decided to write ‘No’ for me… and I was shocked! I became frantic and told her to write correctly leh… coz even canceling can be awkward to the course facilitator when he actually sees our registration form! Hahahaha… I didn’t expect Rebecca to be so daringly humorous! *Laugh*… =)

Time passed rather quickly, though I found the teaching not very in-depth and the booklet given out not much of a read. There were more blank pages than pages with words! I might as well bring my own notebook! Sigh…

Deep in my mind, I was pondering whether this course is too simplistic and general for Rebecca and I, coz being the person that I am, we have already brought up many of such issues to discuss beforehand.

After the session ended, I walked back into the room to ask Raj if there was any good book or material that he could recommend as additional reading. I really wanted to find out more, and not just attend a simple and general course. To my horror, Raj said that he does not know of any! I was stunned! How can he not know of any! Does he even read? Where does he get his material to share with us? He doesn’t even know a single book to recommend for further reading? Where does the material in this booklet come from then?

I was disappointed, really. I am not sure if Rebecca sensed it, but I was glad to hear that she raised a question as to whether we would like to also attend the premarital counseling course organized by MCYS. I would love too! More teaching and guidance wouldn’t harm! But let us complete these 8 weeks first. I really hope it won’t be too simple and non-specific. After all, we are talking about a life-time commitment here…

Emergency Call Back

Both Rebecca and I thought that all was well last Saturday afternoon, until dinner time when we arrived at Block 85 market. We had just ordered two bowls of hokkien mee, when Rebecca suddenly received a phone call from her younger brother, telling her to rush home immediately!

So I cancelled the order and we rushed back to her home. We fought out that her Dad was seriously bleeding from his recent surgery for piles, since about a week ago. Over this week, it has been a very trying time for him, as he had to struggle with the pain, as well as trying to urinate and pass motion. For many days, he could not pass out this waste and the pain was causing him to lose sleep.

Closer towards last weekend, after much prayer, Uncle John was able to urinate and pass motion. However, it seemed to be more of passing out blood and clots into the toilet bowl.

Even despite his condition, over these past few days, he still took the time to read a Christian book on how to conduct new believers Bible Study! I was shocked that he still carries this passion, despite being in so much discomfort! It really made me yearn more to discover my passion in life. But I have not found it yet…

Last Saturday evening it suddenly got worse, and the wound would start to bleed whenever Uncle John stood up. He could not even stand coz the blood would just flow out from his surgery wound.

All of us were very worried and there was anxious discussion, procrastination by Uncle John, searching for the clinic’s 24 hours hotline, unanswered calls to the HR person in charge of Uncle John’s company, the arrival of his sister Catherine, calling of the doctor who operated on Uncle John, calling of Aunty Stephanie and deciding which hospital to got to… which surgeon is experienced and reliable…

Rebecca’s neighbors came in to see how Uncle John was doing. They still didn’t look friendly to me, even after more than 5 years. I wonder why. Must I always be the one who take the initiative to talk to them? They are the ones who should be comfortable coz its familiar territory and people. I am a stranger in this land…

Finally, it was decided that we should call for the ambulance. At the meantime, we did what we could to help around the house, while Uncle John lay on the bed with a towel placed under his shorts. Then we gathered at the bed-side to pray for Uncle John. The ambulance came shortly, and together with the other 3 ambulance staff, I helped to carry Uncle John in a bright orange colored stretcher upstairs towards the lift.

Uncle John was heavy and I was wondering why the hospital didn’t send enough staff to help carry him. What if I wasn’t there? I am sure that Aunty Molly would have enough strength to assist in the carrying, but that wasn’t the point! How can the hospital not send enough staff to carry the patient? I was able to help with the carrying, but back in mind I was thinking how useful it would be to be strong and fit, in times of emergency… be it for men or women alike.

It was my first time seeing ambulance staff arrive at a home to carry out a patient. For a moment, it looked like some TCS serial drama, but I steadied my mind to remember that it was not. It was no show, this is real. At the back of my mind, I was hoping that Uncle John would be able to recover ASAP as he has been bleeding and suffering for over a week already. Yet another part of my mind wondered what if one day it was time for Uncle John to return to Heaven? How would it be like in this house, in this family? Would the scene look like this too? Hmm… It’s just a thought, but this could happen to anybody. And worse still, the person may not even be at home. I know my grandfather just collapsed and died from a sudden heart attack at the coffee shop across his flat.

Anyway, Aunty Catherine, Aunty Molly and Evelyn went along to the hospital, while I walked across to Block 85 to buy dinner for Rebecca and myself, coz we abandoned our dinner and Rebecca’s coffee earlier to rush back home. The hokkien mee that I bought didn’t taste nice, maybe its because its near the shop closing hours and the fella didn’t have much mood to cook it properly. But then again, neither did we have much appetite… but nevertheless, it was still important to eat some food. After eating, I went home coz it was already past 1am, and there was church service the next day.

Surprise Banana and Choc!

Last Saturday, Rebecca came over to my house to spend time together. What I assumed was just like any typical Saturday, turned out otherwise. Rebecca arrived at my doorstep carrying a surprise birthday cake!

I was stunned… and I was even more stunned when she told me that she had pre-informed my parents, telling them not to go out that morning coz she would be bringing over a surprise birthday cake for me! It was such a pleasant surprise!

After we had finished eating Block 85’s tasty nasi lemak (our usual breakfast menu), we brought out my birthday cake to celebrate with my parents. It was a chocolate and banana cake! I snapped a few photographs and my parents took a few photographs of Rebecca and me.

It was a happy time… and also a humorous time coz it was one of the few times that my Mum actually tried to take a photo using a digital camera! It was so funny coz she only focused on our faces and forgot about making sure the cake was in the picture! We all had a good laugh… Hahahaha… =)

Thinking back, I am glad and thankful coz it’s the first time that someone pre-empt my parents and brought a surprise birthday cake for me! And this person is none other than my girlfriend, Rebecca! I really appreciate her thought and effort. It really made me smile… =)

It was a quiet and fun time that Rebecca and I spent last Saturday. We even took silly photographs and video clips of ourselves at the pool! What a ‘happening’ way to celebrate my 26th birthday at my house! This is also our first time taking photos of ourselves at my pool… Hee!

After my bath, I received an SMS from Rebecca telling me to check my letterbox. And wow and behold… there was a birthday cake waiting inside for me! She had put it there intentionally to give me another surprise! Wow… this is the first time that my Darling surprised me twice in a single day. I felt very happy!

So we sat at the Clubhouse to read my birthday card. It’s a very humorous card! The front cover of the card showed 4 mice walking around almost blind… some with huge thick spectacles and others without. One mouse was even searching for the floor saying, “My contacts… my contacts…” Hahahaha… it was so cute! And both of us had a good laugh, again and again. *Laugh*… =)

After Work Reflections

My working schedule has been hectic for the past 2 weeks (including this week). Of coz, I am not comparing with any other occupation in this world, or any other backward third world country. But the truth is that I really am up till my nose in my growing pile of work. Literally ‘nose’, not ‘neck’ level. ‘Neck’ level means still can breathe and tread water. ‘Nose’ level means cannot breathe properly already and struggling to stay afloat.

Indeed, this is very true. I have lost my appetite since the past week till now. Worse still, I didn’t even have the appetite or the time to eat my lunch for the past 3 days! Just rushing here and there, meetings after meetings, responding to e-mails after e-mails, and occasional get ‘shot’ by ‘arrows’ from my superiors.

My meals have been irregular, though I do make sure that I have at least 7 hours of sleep each night. Thankfully, in the midst of the germs that are around, at the office and in public transport… I am still relatively well, except for the recent slight bleeding nose… probably due to the heatiness from the lack of water and food. I really do want to change, but very often, I don’t even have the time to go to the toilet, while in the midst of rushing all my work.

In the midst of all these, it is also not easy trying to manage between two bosses – the Executive Director and my Dept Head. Both have their tasks assigned to me and I really am trying to do as much as I can. But it is really not easy to cope with all the workload. Plus, I also have to work with a colleague under me to make sure that things are still going reasonably well for our project.

My job has its toils, worries and question marks… but oh well, that’s working life. Sometimes I get so busy at work that I come home feeling listless, bored and lonely. I just don’t know what I should do at home, or what I want to do. I just don’t feel like doing anything. Is it because I am tired? Work definitely saps my energy, but I am not exhausted yet, thankfully… or maybe it’s because I try to get at least 7 hours of sleep every night.

But even so, I am getting worried about this listlessness that I feel every evening when I come home from work. I dislike being lonely, yet I don’t really enjoy being around people whom I do not know, or especially when I don’t like their presence. I start to ask myself if is it my body clock telling me that life and relationship is getting dull, and it’s time to move on to get married.

Well, I do want to get married, hopefully soon… coz I really do look forward to having a wife, home and children of my own. It’s a heavy responsibility, but at least I know that I belong to a group of people whom are my family… my own flesh and blood.

Parents are still important to me, but I guess at a certain stage in life, I do feel a desire to move on with my life; to make something out of it. Not just doing my best where I am at in my job, but also in terms of my social life, and more specifically, in the area of my relationship with the woman whom I love and want to spend my life with.

This is one of the rare Blog entries that I just type whatever I am thinking, coz I really can’t be bothered about structure or organized content right now. It’s rather messy up there in my mind, clouded with thoughts and my heart clogged with feelings that I have no way of expressing them. Sometimes I wonder if I am trying hard not to recognize my humanity… or am I trying to shun away from the human nature which I am made up… or does freedom of expression and belongingness only begin after getting married… I really don’t know.

Where exactly do friends stand in my life? Almost none. Why? Coz we are all so busy with our own careers and are tired out at the end of each day. On the weekends, my greatest hope is to spend time with my girlfriend, coz she is by far the only person whom I can be free to be myself and relate whatever crap and shit that I have to express out to her.

Maybe that’s why I am feeling listless or starved at times, coz there is no one whom I can express anything to at the end of each long work day. I come home, eat dinner, shower… then start wondering what should I do before I sleep? And I stare blankly, coz I really don’t have any mood to do anything… and I am all alone in my own room… away from my loved one, and stuffed up in my own subconscious thoughts, without any means to release or express them.

Now that’s something about having a special person in my life. Relating to this special individual is just different, compared to everyone else around me. There is just a sense of comfort just knowing that this special woman is right next to me. It’s a feeling of security and coziness that I can’t find in anyone else in this world.

Talking about God, well… I really don’t know how stale my relationship has been with Him. I do know it’s important to pray, but I really don’t know what to say coz my heart is just clogged up with so many unexpressed things, coz there is no one around to share them with. I don’t even know where to start and what words to start to pray. Anyway, God knows what’s in my heart and mind, so what in the world should I say?

I think of Job (in the Bible) grumbling to God in prayer, and once in a long while, I do get this feeling of grumbling at Him for things… but after some time, as life goes on, I just feel that there isn’t much point of making a fuss out of things, coz the situation won’t change much anyway. And many a times, either God is silent or I just can’t hear from Him. Yet there are times that God may choose to remain silent, I don’t know. So I have gotten to the stage of feeling dry and stagnant… without inspiration… and just accepting things the way they are right now.

I know I shouldn’t think this way, but I am just letting my fingers do the typing, coz I really don’t know who to turn to. And even while I am typing, I wonder how I would feel after I post this Blog… and I realized that I still wouldn’t feel any better. Yet what should I do then? I really don’t know… Sleep early to forget my troubles?

Sometimes I wonder if that’s why I am beginning to sleep early (besides the fact that my girlfriend needs to sleep early) coz I am really tired of dwelling on my starved heart and dry spirit. But yet, I cannot deny that this doesn’t exist… that this isn’t happening… What should I do? What should I think? What is the right way to feel? Are these all the wrong questions that I should ask? What are the right answers? Who can I express them to? Who will respond to me? Sigh…

My birthday is coming… What should I wish for? To get married and have a wife and companion of my own? Sure, I can wish for that… but it still seems so far away… and I don’t know if this is the solution to the problem that I am facing. But it is still my heart’s desire to move on to the next phase of my life and relationship.

Despite all the quick thinking and logic that I have picked up in my job, one thing that I learnt is that logic cannot mend a broken heart… but love can. Knowing the love of God, as well as the loved one that I have in my life…

Stress Level Going Up

Yup, my stress level has been going up since the past week. It has become bad enough that I lost my appetite for the whole of last week! This has almost never happened in my life... probably once or twice as far as I have lived, or as far as I can remember. I didn't even feel this stressed during my exams!

Well, multi-tasking in project work is indeed a strong pressure on its own. This week has gotten worse... I started to feel vomity this Monday afternoon. I don't know if its the food, or the bumpy taxi ride, or the weather, or my high stress level. Maybe its all in a total combination, which is bad. I just hope that after this week, things would get a little better...

My breathing has become shallow too, I noticed. Yeah, its the pressure... sometimes I wonder whether time is chasing us, or we are chasing time...

Her Adorable Ways

Its been over 5 years and Rebecca still allures me with her cute and adorable ways!

Be it from the way she quietly says "Huh!"... to the smile that she puts on my face whenever she looks playfully annoyed whenever I tease her. Oh yes, and I like the way she sometimes turns to look outside the bus window when I tease her... and when I ask why, she would reply cutely by saying, "I want to look at things..." So cute! You must hear it for yourself!

How can I ever find another cute and adorable girlfriend like her? We have our ridiculous ways, but it keeps us sane and gives us opportunities to share private nonsense between the both of us. At times I see her as a woman, and other times as a girl... but to me, she's both! All as well as my lovely girlfriend! =)

A Long Drawn Payment ‘Affair’

Exactly how long is defined as a ‘long drawn affair’? Well, I guess it depends on the level of patience / tolerance of each individual and the situation at hand. For me, this concerns the termination of membership at California Fitness (CF)... and 7 months is long enough to stretch my tolerance level.

Rebecca and I joined CF last year and I paid for both our membership using my Dad’s supplementary credit card. I thought that this would reduce the hassle of making monthly payments, but I was very wrong. As a result of this error decision, I had to remind myself every month to check that the amount charged to both Rebecca and my membership account was correct, ask Rebecca to transfer the money to me, and then I transfer both amounts to my Dad’s savings account. What a hassle!

And as if this wasn’t troublesome enough, we ran into another problem when we tried to convert our mode of payment from credit card deduction to monthly GIRO payment. The administrative procedure at CF was terrible! Totally inefficient and unreliable! Never in my life have I ever encountered such a screwed-up manner of resolving payment issues!

I came from the Telco industry and I have seen for myself how the Finance Dept has to prepare thousands and thousands of invoices every month. This gym definitely has a lesser number of memberships compared to the number of subscriptions for mobile, broadband, SCV, etc… and they can’t even manage!

After two months of trying, we decided to forget about our GIRO conversion coz nothing seems to be happening. But thankfully, the GIRO conversion didn’t go through, coz the credit card deduction is still ongoing! If not, I would be double paying and STILL have to settle both modes of payment at the same time! Argh!

But our troubles weren’t over yet. We decided to pay advanced payment for the last two months, after giving a few months prior notice of membership termination. And I had to spend the next few months, coming down each month, to fill up request form after request form, and thrashing out matters with the counter staff because the credit card is still being deducted! How can this be? I already did the gym a favor by paying them advanced payment through NETS! That’s cash straight into their bank account! What more do they want? For goodness sake, just stop the credit card billing!

As if these aren’t enough frustration already, there was once when the bank had also charged my Dad a late payment for some extra charge for a particular month. I can’t remember what that was about, that additional $9.72 per person, but I seriously don’t want to bother anymore. I just want to settle this issue and put it behind me.

You see, the problem of this sort of recurring payment is because there is always this possibility of deducting an inaccurate amount, and the difficulty in getting the paperwork done to cease the eventual termination. Having learnt from this lesson, I would never want to pay for a recurring billing using a credit card, ever again.

Besides, using this mode of payment only serves to benefit the company, not the customer! The company just informs the bank to deduct a specific sum of money every month from all their customers and transfer the money straight into their company bank account. And the customer won’t even know how much is charged until the end of the month billing comes in!

After that, the customer still has to verify the amount charged (if not have to thrash it out with the bank and/or the company), write a cheque (issuing cheques cost money too) and mail it to the bank. So much hassle… and still have no control over the amount that is charged! And every month, both my Dad and I will get infuriated over billing errors! What for? How ridiculous! I have learnt this lesson and will only use the credit card for ONE-TIME payments only.

Thus, I was angry and upset last night, when I saw that for the 7th time, my Dad had received a repeated billing. My Dad was angry and frustrated too. And this time, my Mum was angry too. I was mad inside… and I felt so tempted to just call up the CF guy (the name’s Eddy), but it was already 1+am, and even if I did that, he wouldn’t be able to do anything anyway. So I tried to calm myself down after grumbling to Rebecca, making her angry about CF again, and decided to go to sleep.

The confrontation took place this morning, when I walked into the gym and asked for Eddy to come to the counter. I spoke to him in a very direct and assertive tone, before he decided to bring in his manager to resolve this issue.

Her name is Narul, the assistant member services manager. She was a lot more assertive than Eddy, and I could tell that she has a sharp tongue. I never liked women with a sharp tongue, but I guess in this area of work, the staff needs to have a sharp tongue to deal with customers.

With both of us showing a solemn and straight face (not difficult for me coz I am usually quite straight faced), we thrashed out the issues one at the time, until I got the termination papers from her, with the necessary pointers written out and signed on the documents. These papers will have to be faxed to the UOB bank staff tomorrow to arrest this issue. The bank is pissed and my family is pissed.

Although I was a bit affected by her assertive and arrogant tone, I decided to ignore it and settle it, despite the tense and confrontational atmosphere in her office. We thrashed out the issues in a sharp and harsh tone, while looking at the details on her PC… which reminded me about how annoyed I was, when Eddy told me last month, that they had lost all my previous request forms! I was in such a rage, but I did not show it and my best to keep my anger inside. What sort of procedures does the gym have? Fancy losing documents, even repeated ones?

That was my last straw… I had lost all confidence in this organization already. As I told Rebecca last night, CF appears very good in its advertising and marketing campaigns, but their admin procedures and manner of resolving disputes are INDESCRIBABLY terrible! And it’s not just for my case. I have heard stories from Rebecca about her colleague’s experience with CF too. Sigh!

Lastly, I took my (first ever) bold step of asking for compensation for the amount time and transport cost that I had incurred from the repeated visits over the past 7 months. Narul listened steadily and I could tell that she was sharp and poised. She rejected my request for monetary compensation, and I clearly remembered her saying that California Fitness does not give monetary compensation, and it does not intend to do so, now or in the future.

Wow… very sharp and harsh. Never mind, so I turned the table around towards her and asked what form of compensation she would recommend instead. So she said that CF can offer gifts such as a bag or CF T-shirt. When I heard that my mind exploded! But of coz, I have learnt not to show it. It exploded because this was nonsense! Does she think that I would be taken by this gimmick? These t-shirt and bag are mass produced and do not cost to them as much as if a customer were to purchase it for himself! What would be the cost of the gym? Negligible!

What’s more, with this sort of unpleasantness with the gym, does she expect me to carry their bag with their logo, or wear their t-shirt with their logo? I am not stupid! I can see that such gifts may seem like gifts to customers, but I wonder how many people notice that it also serves as a mass marketing tool for the company! Why should I give them added free advertising?! No way!

So in the end, we settled for two months free membership for both Rebecca and I. I haven’t decided if I would go, but if I would, at least it would be of some gain to me. Not free advertising for them, or some t-shirt or bag that are manufactured on the economies of scale. At least if I use the gym, they will still incur cost… like wear and tear of gym equipment over time, cost of water in the shower... and I get to exercise too. Not that I am calculative, coz seriously I just want to walk out of this episode of my life. But even so, I am not about to let the gym walk off just like that either.

The Girl with Big Teeth

Who is this girl? It’s Rebecca! Who called her that? The dentist at our primary school! =)

Yeah, it was a nice joke hearing it from her over lunch this afternoon. Her brother Amos was having lunch with us too.

After hearing this joke, I thought back to my primary school days and realized how fun it was to receive this small red card telling me to go to the school dentist downstairs! I kind of like this sort of interruption… and it’s a good opportunity for me to walk around the school, while everybody is having lessons!

I remembered that I would take my time to walk down the stairs, go toilet, etc. It was a great feeling coz no teacher can scold me for wandering around, coz I was holding this dental card! Aha! Yeah, I was a naughty boy… and I liked it that way!

Ever since young, I enjoyed going to the dentist… even till this age, surpassing my mid 20s. I guess the reason why I like visiting the dentist is because it feels great to have my teeth cleaned! I like the fresh and clean sensation after every dental check-up! Just that nowadays, it is expensive to visit the dentist… and my company does not even subsidize a single cent… so I go only once a year.

Sometimes I wonder if it is more interesting to be a dentist or general practitioner. A dentist seems like a boring job to me, just staring into others’ mouth and scrapping away in between their teeth. A GP seems to have more different kinds of symptoms to diagnose. Hmm… but no matter, I am neither interested in both occupations. *Laugh*… =)

A Lazy Saturday Morning

This Saturday was lazy morning for me… but I really like it that way. That’s how I wish my Saturdays would be. A day of rest… A day without waking up to the alarm clock...

I am convicted to the fact that prioritizing my rest and recreation is a strong factor in rejuvenating my mind and body for the next week ahead. It is of benefit to both me and my company that I do so… especially when I know that this coming week would be lined up with 11 meetings in 5 days, on top of my already heavy workload.

Thankfully, with appropriate delegation to my APE (Assistant Project Executive), I am able to reduce it to 7 meeting in 5 days, which is STILL a lot, considering my overwhelming workload. Effective delegation is still something that I am learning.

But what exactly would be an ideal Saturday morning for me? Well, if I am spending that morning alone, I would definitely love to be able to sleep in, waking up NATURALLY without the ringing of the alarm clock. In addition, I would love to stroll out to McDonalds for a quiet morning breakfast, read a book, while allowing my mind to drift away in a slowed down pace, without the need for quick thinking, as I always have to do from Mondays to Fridays.

As the saying goes about taking time to stop and ‘smell the roses’… I think this phrase is very true. What’s the matter of rushing through life’s journey? And as my senior pastor used to say, “There’s more to life than increasing its pace.”

Personally, I think it’s a great habit at times, to stop and watch the world go by. If we get so caught up with this and that, then miss out those little things that go by unnoticed. Like the quiet stars in the night sky, a gentle breeze along Bedok Jetty, a nicely made cheese omelette, the sound of birds chirping, noticing the greenery around, hearing children splash water in the pool, taking a minute to gaze into your spouse’s eyes, or even stopping to be thankful for the colors that we see all around. Isn’t that so wonderful?

Another statement that someone once told me that, “Nobody lying on the deathbed would ever wish that he or she had spent more time in the office.” Think about it…

Alas, as the wordings on my magnet states, “The best things in life are NOT things.” How true this is… Praise the Lord for these marvelous blessings… =)

Bees Make Honey

This Saturday evening, during a phone call with Rebecca, I was corrected when I told her that I am going to make honey! Interestingly, she has this peculiar way of picking up this kind of weird phrasing…

She remarked, “Huh? Male honey?” Then I said, “No… I said that I am going to make honey.” So she asked, “You are a bee ah… can make honey? Only bees can make honey!” And we both burst out laughing! =)

Words can sometimes be so easy to express that we don’t really pay much attention to it… *Laugh*.

Managing a Subordinate

After being put in charge of a project (among my other projects), I was given one assistant executive to work together on this most recent project.

Over these weeks, I discovered that managing and working with a subordinate is really not an easy responsibility. Everyone seems to have a mind of their own, and sometimes it isn’t simple to persuade or convince them to work along with your instruction.

During this week, I had encountered disagreements over big and small decisions, sometime as small as repeatedly telling him to pay more attention to spelling errors, grammatical mistakes, un-standardized paragraphing, amount of page border to reserve, how and where to arrange companies’ logos, type of font to be used for documents, what level of detail is required for reporting, when to make follow up calls to member companies, how to organize meeting dates, etc. The list is unending!

I recalled that I was once reprimanded by my Dept Head for being too lenient and soft on my project deadlines and level of expectations. I am now learning to be even more strict and disciplined. Work is in the end still work… and we are paid to do a job and get it done.

One more very obvious fact that I learnt is that what is of priority to me, may not be such a level of priority to others. This is one hard fact that everyone has to recognize when it comes to working with people. Priorities differ, even though it may not seem so from the surface. But oh well, its part of learning how to manage and interact with people. It’s still a good learning experience so far. =)

Rise to the Challenge

Last week, I was evaluated for my performance for my confirmation report. I was really surprised at my results, though I know that there is still SO much to improve to further enhance and develop my character, abilities and career.

Since then, I remembered what my Dept Head said to me – that he will refrain from hand-holding me from now onwards and let me make decisions on how to manage and get the project tasks done. I felt empowered though apprehensive. Yet, there is much that I had learnt from Andy, over the past 6 months. And I recognized that this is the way to expose myself to greater challenges.

A child who is always held by the hand will never gain confidence to walk on his own, much less run, swim or jump. Thus, I really appreciated this empowerment and over the past week, I have been doing my best in making sure that I maintain a clear mind to make properly assessed decisions for the project that I am put in charge of. May God guide me as I do my best… =)

Discover Networking

I really have an interesting job. It’s full of surprises! One time it can be this, and another time it can be about that. This week had a particularly strong focus on networking. Although I am not a stranger to the concept of networking, actually having to find myself doing it surely did prove much of an uphill task to me!

We organized two industry work group meetings this week, of which employers from our member companies were attending. Besides the intended objective of announcing latest industry updates, one of the purposes were to network among the employers and hopefully create a strong awareness and interest to work with us on some of the various funding incentive schemes.

After the briefing, it was the time for refreshments and networking. Being a greenhorn in networking, I tried my best, but it still turned out quite shabbily. It’s really not easy to just strike up a continual conversation with managers and directors whom I have never had correspondence before.

It didn’t take long for me to find myself wondering around not knowing who to start talking to, and how to start the conversation with them. And the most difficult part is to know how to continue the conversation that would lead onto something of interest to both parties.

Indeed, I soon realized that networking is either a natural talent that comes naturally for some people (e.g. my Dept Head) or a hard-learnt skill from observing others and yourself having the actual experience of doing it. It’s like a fear of talking on stage, just that this is worse… coz it’s mostly a one-way communication on stage, but on the ground during networking, I actually have to establish a two-way, or sometimes even up to a four-way conversation between several parties at the same time!

I discovered that this really involved quick thinking and often even humor! The part about quick thinking isn’t too uphill a task to me (as this has become part of my job), but it’s the part about popping relevant humor that REALLY poses as a challenge to me. To crack a success joke or remark, really involves either strong charisma or a good deal of understanding of the other parties, such that they actually understand what I am commenting about. Now this is really difficult.

Furthermore, these managers and directors who are in the age of 40s and above, some probably having working experience longer than I have been alive so far. Thus, striking up a conversation and building a positive working relationship with such authority figures is no easy task… especially since I have a young look, plus they definitely have more knowledge content to discuss than a greenhorn like me.

Therefore, another essential attribute to learning the ropes of success networking is to have courage and confidence. It is about building a mindset of recognizing that I am junior, yet not without passion or interest in what it going on.

Another source of useful meetings, as I have also discovered this week, is the amount that I can learn from attending higher level committee meetings with the big shots. Of coz, this knowledge first begins as CONFUSION, as I clearly realized when I attended the 2nd employment subcommittee meeting for the persons with disabilities this week.

As I sat at the back row, away from the typical long boardroom table, I discovered that almost 80% of what was discussed sounded like Greek… or maybe I should call it Hebrew... to me. These are national policy issues and project initiatives being discussed… and I am so lacking in knowledge and exposure to comprehend what on earth was going on! But I steadied myself and tried to guess and figure out as much as possible. At the end, all my efforts of figuring out didn’t turn out very successful and comprehensible… but I wasn’t giving up yet. I tell myself that it takes time… exposure and experience takes time.

Yet I must comment that attending such meetings really broadens my mind about what are some of the possible issues that are brought up at director or CEO level. All these issues really stem from a larger picture, far from the ground level issues that operational people like me face. Even so, our feedback is important as it constitutes the successful implementation and adjustment for each particular project.

Reflecting about this on the bus home that evening, it really made me wonder how broad the scale of discussion is for the ministers of the country. Thinking back on the subcommittee meeting, at times I am just in awe of how many issues could be raised and the amount of intricate details that come into play. In short, it REALLY isn’t a bed of roses to manage a national-wide project… much less running a country. It’s serious business here. Wow…

Marks & Spencer Jam Tarts

Some weeks ago, a colleague passed around this pack of chewy tasting biscuits that made an impression in my taste buds. It was the jam tarts from Marks & Spencer! Since that first biscuit, I decided to buy it for myself and another pack for Rebecca to try.

Thus, one evening, while we were strolling around a Marks & Spencer retail outlet, Rebecca told me that her family prefers a particular type of chocolate biscuit so I decided to buy 3 different packs of biscuits for Rebecca and her family. It turned out that her Mum liked the jam tarts more than the chocolate biscuits! *Laugh*.

I really enjoy sharing good stuff with the people whom I care about. Thank God for giving me the resources to share with them… =)

Hobby of Photography

Ever since I went for my Overseas Student Programme as part of my undergraduate studies in the year end of 2003, I have been fascinated by the wonderous scenery that our Heavenly Father has made. This came especially strong to me, when I remembered standing on the beach near Melbourne... my heart and voice just rising in praise to God for this wonderful work of creation!

I still recall that I took over 700 photographs with my newly bought Ricoh digital camera! 700+ photos is no joke! And since then, I grew to have a fond interest in photography. Of coz, over time, the interest slipped, due to the fatigue and hectic working life. But once in a blue moon, I do wonder to myself, whether I would ever get a chance to pick up the skill in professional photography. This means not using a typical automatic digital camera that most people buy and use, but the standard professional SLR digital camera, with both manual and automatic functions, as well as different types of focal lens.

Alas, this is one of the expensive hobbies to pick up... furthermore, there isn't much beautiful scenery in Singapore. But I would still love to capture stunning and beautiful photographs when I am overseas! Hmm... I wonder... I'll see how... It's difficult to say... I don't travel much either...

Musical within a Musical

Rebecca and I visited Sean’s church this Saturday evening to watch his church’s 1st musical performance, marking its 25th anniversary. I think the last time that Rebecca and I visited his church was about 2 years ago.

The musical was well performed with an interesting concept of portraying a musical within a musical, i.e. a musical about performers acting out a musical. I really liked the songs that were sung. Very creative lyrics and it was definitely well-rehearsed. I wonder if the church would be producing a music CD.

Sean acted as Kai Feng, the ‘backstage guy’ who serves in the area of logistics and stage props, almost unnoticed by most people, performer or audience. Sean acted his role well; though I didn’t think that the name ‘Kai Feng’ suited his look very well… but oh well, it’s only a name.

Ok, that’s the good part. For the bad part… there were two photographers who went around taking photos with this huge white and awesomely bright flash light! It was terribly uncomfortable for us coz we had to look away whenever we saw the photographer raise his camera to take a shot. No kidding, the flash was REALLY bright and glaring! I have never seen any photographer use such a blinding flash before! I wonder how the musical performers felt… or whether they were blinded by this awesome blast of light.

The buffet dinner was good… and also partly because we were hungry. Initially, we thought that dinner was before the musical performance, but upon reaching there, we realized that this cannot be, coz the dish trays were still empty. Thankfully, Rebecca gave me this tiny piece of chocolate, in which the brand name on the wrapper stated ‘Andes’. We laughed coz it was pronounced like “Andy’s”, which is my Dept Head’s name! ‘Andes chocolate’ = ‘Andy’s chocolate’.

I was surprised to notice that Sean’s Dad came to watch his performance! I smiled happily inside my heart. It’s great to see his Dad getting more involved in Sean’s life. I am really happy for him. Sean brought a student from his primary school too. Wow…

On the way home, I was just airing my thoughts to Rebecca about what if Sean’s performance character’s name was actually his real name ‘Ta Shen’… at this, Rebecca exclaimed, “Tarzan?” And we both burst of laughing… Hahahaha… It’s not the first time that we misheard what each other had said… and heard something else which turned out to be an unintended joke! *Laugh*… =)

The 3 Most Common Things To Do

I woke up this Saturday, wondering what is there really to do in Singapore? After some thought, I could only think of the 3 most common things which people do in Singapore - (1) Eat, (2), Shop and (3) Watch Movie.

Of coz, there are other activities like going to the gym, playing a sport, hang out at cafes, clubbing at discos, etc... but in my opinion, it seems like the 3 most common activities are eating, shopping and watching movie. There just isn't much to do here, is it? Hmm...

Dilemma about Human Beings

Human beings are unpredictable. As long as there is an essence of life, there will be many factors that make us ‘tick’... or in other words, complexities that determine how we behave. Sometimes I don’t know whether it’s something scary or something to appreciate about the intricacies of God’s creation.

Let’s put hormones aside, coz that’s something that is our humanistic make-up. ‘Experiences’ is the word. This is what really amazes me… the depth and extent of how experiences can determine and even at times control a person’s thoughts and behavior.

Spending the bulk of waking hours at work, this can be evidently observed and / or felt at the workplace. In fact, it isn’t solely the workplace… even in church, this can be noticed. In short, wherever there are human beings, there will be differences (positive and negative).

Positive differences can be seen through an individual’s ability in certain areas of work, thought or interaction. Negative differences are realized through how work is done or when an unpleasant interaction takes place between people. Either way, we can’t avoid both the positive and negative differences of human beings.

Each of us is brought up under very different circumstances, be it at either extremes or somewhere neutral in between the two. This is one fact that cannot be disputed, for everyone has different parents, lifestyle, etc… and especially their own distinct temperament. These experiences mold our character and mind.

At work, I began to realize that there are instances where colleagues dispute over the font color to be used, what kind of border design, how should the layout look like, is the content long or short, how to take notes, whether to present using presentation slide or word document, to make a phone call or send an e-mail, etc.

There are all sorts of habits and preferences! At times, moods would be affected when people don’t agree with each other. Then there is also an aspect of how to respond to authority figures, what is considered a fair and unfair expectation, whose task is of priority, etc. Sometimes it can be such a headache. That’s why learning to manage your bosses, colleagues and external parties is indeed a skill.

But this is part and parcel of interacting with human beings. Even animals fight with one another, whether of the same species or not. Plants also compete for sunlight, nutrients and water. Such is the complexities of living things…